Dear Dreams,
For the last 21 years you've been my alternate reality. You've been my truth, my perception, the dictating force behind my crazy, inexplicable actions.
Sometimes I believe our relationship is three-dimensional. Always so vividly and precisely do I see you. Always lurid, I sense you. I feel you in my heart but need to see you conceptualize outside that realm. I need to see the aspirations and premonitions develop beyond what I envision. I need the ability to map out the road to my success.
Looking back, I can barely remember what I dreamed of freshman year. I feel as if I've fallen short of the sights on which I first set my eyes.
Becoming a mother and fiancée in a matter of months shifted my energy towards different things. Postpartum depression clouded my judgment and I lost touch with you all and reality for a second. Realizing the gift that motherhood is has helped new dreams manifest.
Sometimes I feel like my fiancé doesn't understand this, this wishing-washing-jagged in my brain. He doesn't get that my reality has always existed in my head. With his help, however, I've learned to write and let the world hear what I have to say. I've found a voice. I will use it to teach others to find the voices inside themselves.
In many ways, I am like you dreams. Patient, wishful, full of hope and never-ending.
I am waiting to see what happens with us. We've always made beautiful things.
-Court
Beautiful. Continue to use your voice and inspire others to do the same.
ReplyDelete